F*** YOU BUZZFEED

FU Buzzfeed! Seriously, FU.

I can’t. stop. taking. quizzes.

I’m not sure why I need to know what Lindsay Lohan character I am (Lola from Confessions of a Drama Queen) or which celebrity DILF I should hook up with (Tyson Beckford) or if I can identify a chip just by looking at it (sadly, yes). But I do. God, I really do.

Today I took, “Would a teen think you’re cool?” Teens didn’t think I was cool when I was a teen and according to Buzzfeed…

Screen Shot 2015-02-20 at 9.49.56 AM

they still don’t.

FU Buzzfeed. And FU teens.

Sometimes I’ll take quizzes through the eyes of my husband and then get really mad at him when I don’t like the results. For instance, he too should hook up with Tyson Beckford. What a dick. For two reasons: one for cheating on me, and two for stealing my celebrity DILF hookup.

And then there’s this:

Screen Shot 2015-02-20 at 9.28.09 AM

Can you believe that jerk actually let himself get eaten by a bear!? We have a kid! Thanks for making me a single mom and leaving me to clean up the remains of your mutilated body, douche canoe! I can’t do everything, you know!

I think he knows I have this problem because I got this random text from him:

buzzfeed

Whatever. I hate you Buzzfeed but I love you. Quiz me harder.

P.S. What the hell is a douche canoe? Buzzfeed used it so I pretended to know hoping a teen might think I’m cool.

About Diana Davis

I’m a writer with a blog that will send my kids to therapy one day. Until then I invite you to laugh with me at their expense. Don't worry they love it. They're smiling already—or maybe that’s just gas.
This entry was posted in Humor, Marriage, random thoughts and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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