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Tag Archives: fashion
Graffiti Dick
This morning I was stuck sitting on a train that didn’t budge for 15 minutes and while I would normally spend that time cursing out the train conductor and questioning all of my life decisions, instead I spent that time staring … Continue reading
Posted in random shit, Uncategorized
Tagged amy schumer, animals, astrology, Blogging, books, comedy, cooking, dark comedy, dogs, earth, entertainment, exercise, family, fashion, food, friends, funny, literature, money, movies, music, netflix, parenting, photos, politics, television, travel, women, writing
2 Comments
BrundleElmo
Alex went to a birthday party yesterday and an incredibly talented balloon artist made her this Elmo. One night in my house with my kids and Elmo looks like this… BrundleElmo. Only a true horror fan will get that reference. If … Continue reading
A Pubic Service Announcement
I Windex’d my magnifying mirror this morning. From now on I will only interact with cataracts and glaucoma patients. I’m also putting back the layer of dust I removed and adding an extra layer to all of my mirrors. Then I’m … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged amy schumer, babies, exercise, fashion, food, fun, makeup, marriage, netflix, parenting, pregnancy
3 Comments
5 shades of coffee
I take my coffee beige. Not brown or ivory or that awful cadaver gray color you get when you use skim milk. And certainly not black—Jesus, who do I look like, Vin Diesel? I assume he takes his coffee black … Continue reading
Ouch.
I sprained my wrist. For days I had no idea how and I swear the memory loss was from sleep deprivation and not vodka (this time). I assumed it was from lugging around a 35 pound toddler and a 20 … Continue reading
Chapter 1: My Childhood Summed Up Through a Bunch of Weird and Somewhat Offensive Shit I Was Told Before I was 12
This list consists mostly of things that my grandmother or my mother told me. But if you ask my mother she will vehemently deny it and if you ask my grandmother, you’re probably a medium and that’s really awesome, but … Continue reading
Posted in apartment living, art, babies, books, exercise, family, fitness, food, friends, fun, good advice, health, hockey, Humor, labor, Love, mad, Marriage, mother, pregnancy, random rants, random shit, the slightly exaggerated story of my life, Uncategorized
Tagged babies, baby, exercise, facebook, fashion, fitness, food, fun, funny, game of thrones, humor, marriage, moms, netflix, parenting, relationships, travel
5 Comments
IT FOLLOWS (An awesome horror movie. An awesome fitness plan.)
I saw It Follows on Sunday. It’s that new horror movie on Netflix about a girl who is stalked by an evil, unknown supernatural entity. I spent an hour and 47 minutes thinking: Holy shit! What better way to meet … Continue reading
Posted in The Spew Review
Tagged comedy, exercise, facebook, fashion, food, funny, game of thrones, horror movies, It follows, netflix, television, Train Wreck, weight loss, wine
6 Comments
