Tag Archives: parenting

Chapter 1: My Childhood Summed Up Through a Bunch of Weird and Somewhat Offensive Shit I Was Told Before I was 12

This list consists mostly of things that my grandmother or my mother told me. But if you ask my mother she will vehemently deny it and if you ask my grandmother, you’re probably a medium and that’s really awesome, but … Continue reading

Posted in apartment living, art, babies, books, exercise, family, fitness, food, friends, fun, good advice, health, hockey, Humor, labor, Love, mad, Marriage, mother, pregnancy, random rants, random shit, the slightly exaggerated story of my life, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

JERRY THE BEAR

An amazing little startup company called, Sproutel asked me to write about their product Jerry the Bear. Without knowing anything about Jerry, I immediately jumped at the opportunity because—OH. MY. GOD! Is he like Ted?! Please say he’s like Ted! I … Continue reading

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21 THINGS YOUR PRE-PREGNANCY JEANS WOULD SAY IF THEY COULD BREATHE

Noooooo! Anything but the pliers. I don’t care about your ribs. Suck in harder! “These jeans” don’t give you camel toe. Your fat ass does. Seriously, even porn stars don’t get this up-close and personal with vaginas. No! You don’t … Continue reading

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DON’T EAT DORITOS WHILE BRUSHING YOUR TEETH

I wasn’t going to post today because as my husband says, “Nobody wants to hear from you every day. I sure don’t.” Point taken. But I need to address something very serious. Anyone who uses a blogging site is probably … Continue reading

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RELAX LADIES…IT’S OK TO LOOK LIKE YOU JUST CRAWLED OUT OF A GRAVE

If you’re my mom (or that one person in Tajikistan that pops up on my stats page every day) then you’ve read all of my posts and have probably noticed that I’ve referenced The Walking Dead more than once. That’s … Continue reading

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WHAT’D YOU POOP IN YOUR EYE?

This may be my last post. I have flesh-eating bacteria. Ok maybe I’m a bit of a hypochondriac. And maybe my mother was right when she assured me that I do not have all of the symptoms of prostate cancer. … Continue reading

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